There was a little black radio cassette that Bapa used to have. He put it at home for us to know we have one thing fancy when he was away into the jungle to install electricity in other villages. I think that’s heavy! One time when he was with us at home, turned it on to my ears, he was smiling deep to me. It was a recording of my little shy smooth voice when I was learning to talk. I didn’t really talk, no, I was just responding to him. It was only two of us, Siblings and Mama were laughing, as per the recording had it. Everyone laughed at my voice without me knowing why, perhaps my voice was made to make everyone laugh, what’s the different? Everyone laughed anyway. Forgot what I was saying but knew I wore my tiny red skirt. Topless. Maybe that was why everyone laughed at me. I feel funny to remember my naked belly that day.
To his indulgence, Bapa told me that day that my voice is good for singing. So it went, my very first singing lesson begun. I sang the way he sang. From low tone to really… really high tone. The song started with “jam” and ended with “senang”, A.K.A. time and joy. My imagination followed through the song as I was singing in a sense of security. Because he’s with me. I memorized song quite fast. I sang quite good. I have that memory so strong to this day.
My name is Hasoma, meaning it is ok. It is ok if Bapa left us to go to the jungle. It is ok if everyone laughs at my voice. Hasoma!